This past month i've been noticing so many pregnant ladies, it's probably just me but they're everywhere!! i don't mean to sound bitter but i can't help myself, i just stare at them... There is one particular lady at my work, whom i don't know at all and she's pregnant and she looks awesome, but sometimes when i see her she has this sort of "showing off" look to her, sort of like: "look at me, i look awesome and i'm pregnant and you aren't" ...of course these thoughts are purely in my mind and i'm sure it's not the way she intends to come off but the devil does tempt some times, i honestly have to say the prayer of the heart (Jesus Christ have mercy on me b/c I am a sinner) when i run in to her b/c she makes me so envious but in reality I'm happy for her, it's just the devil is trying to take this cross away from me and make the burden harder then it really is. I can thank God for this cross because it know it will be a Glorious Cross and so far it has been, it has helped me be more compassionate, more selfless and i pray a heck of lot more!!
Baby Showers
On another note, I have two baby showers this month, i would have had 3 but one of them landed the same day as another. Actually i'm hosting both of them, well i'm hosting one and helping out with the other, by planning the games/entertainment, apparently i'm good at it! Last May i hosted one for a close friend of mine, it was tiring but it was fun. I've hosted about 6 in total since i've been married (not that i'm counting). I'm glad to have had the opportunity to do this service for my friends and family because it really helps me to come out of my selfishness.
A silly comment i must get over...
Last month i went to purchase a coffee and a bagel, which is something I usually do every morning when i'm at work (i've stopped doing it though, trying to eat healthier). Anyway, the lady who owns the coffee stand knows me because i go there on and of and have been going there for like 3 years. We say the usual hi, how are you, nice day, small talk stuff anyway. Last month this was the conversation we had
Coffee Lady: Hey didn't you get married like 2 years ago
ME: yes, (i said smiling surprised she remembered)
Coffee Lady: so you aren't pregnant yet?
ME: no, not yet (still smiling, i'm being as good as i can)
Coffee Lady: Oh really, you know, i know quite a few people who got married around the same time as you and you know they all have babies now and/or a pregnant!
(I was so shocked by the comment, totally didn't see it coming)
ME: Oh really. (then i just smiled, payed for the purchase and left)
I was so stunned at her comment, i don't even know her that well, i'm not going to tell her my story, plus there are other people around...what am i supposed to say to that? I've avoided the coffee lady since. I go only when i know she's not there.
Anyway i got to get over her comment so i decide to write it down so it doesn't haunt me, because it then gets me started on "why me God" and then i start to loose hope and get angry instead of accepting it.
Glucose/insulin resistance blood test
Yesterday i had to get tested for my glucose/insulin resistance b/c it looks like I'm borderline. i was at the lab for 4 and a half hours!! i had to fast, and got pricked six times with the needle (six tubes, 3 pricks on each arm) i went in at 9am didn't get out till 1:40pm and was shaking by the end of it b/c i hadn't eaten. The people there were nice but they weren't gentle, my arms are bruised, my arms make me look like a drug addict!! I have so much blood work done, and I'm not complaining, i know it's for a good cause, but i still can't bring myself to watch them take the blood out, i can't see them inject the needle, which is kind of weird because i have no problem injecting needles in my abdomen area (the HCG injections)
that's it for today, i should really be working!
1 comment:
I had to do the insulin resistance test and I was severely insulin resistant! I was miserable after the test so I immediately knew something could not be right in my body! I went in at 7 am and left four hours later! I thank God that Dr. Hilgers knew I needed that test! We have been able to discover so much more about how my body processes because of it and the meds he prescribed are helping so far! God's blessings to you and know there are others who were there too!
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