Miracle intro session!!

Lately I've been lazy and have not been very into working with the fertility care centre. What I mean is that at some point after the pregnancy I wasn't motivated or as excited to work with CRMS and Napro. I was finding it a burden and was losing a bit of interest, I blame the lack of energy I was having the first 3 months but I think it's due to the fact that this work really wasn't easy in the beginning meeting with clients etc...I found it hard to meet up with clients and attend meetings just because I was just tired or needed time for myself. However, once I was at with the client or at meetings I really enjoyed it. It was the getting there part, struggling with myself to keep going since that excitement had left. My H was a bit upset with me saying that he knew I would lose interest afterwards. He says I have a short attention span and things get me excited quickly but then I get bored shortly afterwards.
During the last couple of months I was trying to figure out where my excitement and thrill had gone. I mean it felt like a dream come true to finally be able to contribute to society in a positive way. Up until that point I felt I was just living life for myself and having this nagging feeling that I should be helping others more. I was reading a lot of Mother Teresa during that time and I was feeling pretty lifeless since I saw how I wasn't doing much to help the other (outside of my circle of friends and family). Then this opportunity to help contribute to society in a positive way comes along and I was able to see this as God answering my prayers of trying to come out of myself and my little world. God did make it possible for me to get accepted to this course and learn this great work that helps couples and women so much.

I realize that selfishness and being lazy are my weakness that I have to pray about everyday. I'm so tempted to just live for myself and sit back and wait for things to happen rather then get involved in helping others. Sometimes I feel I have split personality. It's a constant struggle for me, however, this is something I see the Lord helps me conquer over and over again each day. I need to keep up with my prayer life to keep going and put Jesus first in my life.

The reason I'm blogging about this is because of an experience I went through last Thursday at the introductory session for CrMS. It was the first time I was doing it all by myself at the centre, no help, nothing! I've done an intro session by myself but only to family and friends and they don't mind if I hold on to the text book for dear life while I'm presenting to them. I was so nervous the days leading up to the intro session that I was calling my fellow practitioner interns to ask if they wanted to introduce it with me. No one answered my call and the one that did was busy! I wanted to call in sick but I knew this would be childish and irresponsible of me. I even asked my husband to come with me just because I was so scared to go up there by myself. Unfortunately he was busy. I knew that at some point I had to do this on my own (I'm utterly shy and I'm not sure how I'm able to even do this work).
I was there really early set everything up and started practicing breathing exercises to relax ( I don't know any breathing exercises I've never taken classes or anything, all I was really doing was taking in deep breaths!!) I said a prayer and offered up my nervousness to God telling Him if I'm meant to be humiliated then it would be good for my pride!(I knew I'd make mistakes or be unable to answer questions that may arise, which is always my main worry) Making me even more nervous was the fact that the educational program here needs clients for the practitioner interns by mid July because we can't go on to EPII if we each don't have at least 6 clients.

When I reached the center I found out the session was packed (had 5 couples attending and all the seats were full. I must mention we have very little space to host these sessions and so I was surprised to see that my session was packed! I was hoping not all would show up, but of course that would be to easy...ALL showed up!

Thank God they were all nice, how did I judge that they were all nice since I don't really know them? well, they all smiled back and were friendly when they came in!! he he he, serious non-smiling people make me nervous!! (My first couple rarely smiles and have on a serious face, that first client was quite the struggle I tell you)
Well it turns out that I was able to answer all the questions (even though I think I made one answer up, but they bought it! he he he I wasn't too far off with my answer!)and then the miracle happened!!!
ALL 5 COUPLES SIGNED ON BOARD!! They ALL wanted to learn CrMS, I was utterly shocked! I couldn't not believe it!
Lately not many people have been signing up so the interns were struggling with clients, so having all these couple sign up was a complete miracle for the educational program! I can take no credit for their signing up that's for sure, it was the Holy Spirit who touched their hearts to open up and try this method. In addition to that one couple asked me if I could be their practitioner, they had barely known me and they were requesting me. I wasn't going to take any clients from that session because I knew other Interns needed clients more then I did. I needed only 2 more clients but I was going to offer my services for free to one of my SIL and one of my sisters. However since the couple was pretty adamant about having me I took them on. Honestly I was just floored by the fact that they all signed up.

What a gift from God really, to be able to be a small tiny instrument of His despite my weakness and failures, it is true when they say God works on you when you are at your weakest points in life. I guess when we are weak we allow Him to work in us since we know we can not do better. If we think we are strong and can do it on our own then there is no room for Him to work in us.
Anyway, being able to stand infront of others by myself and do a presentation may seem like a little hurdle to others to overcome but form me I feel like I was able to climb the mountain. I'm now a little more confident to be able to do another one, but don't ask me to do one too soon!! :)


In baby news, all is good so far, thanks-to-GOD! It looks like I may have a UTI which really sucks, I've never experienced one before. I'm waiting for confirmation on the urine test results though. As long as it doesn't affect the baby then it's fine with me I guess. I'm finally starting to prepare for the coming of this baby. I don't even know where to start! The procrastinator that I am I will probably be running like a chicken without a head on the last month!!!